If you needed another reason to vote for Obama

I say “Stephen Baldwin,” and you reply “One of the Baldwin brothers, right?” Try to elaborate any further and it gets a little tricky. You can’t say “one of the less talented ones,” because that implies that any of them besides oldest brother Alec actually possesses any scientifically measurable amount of talent. So you have to narrow it down: he’s not Alec, he’s not the one who’s a junkie and he’s not the one who’s married to the chick from Wilson Phillips and starred in that porny movie with Sharon Stone. Whichever one is left standing, that’s Stephen. You may recognize Stephen Baldwin from such treasures of the silver screen as The Sex Monster, The Snake King and Dark Storm. But more likely you’ll only remember him from The Usual Suspects, the only watchable film in his twenty year long acting career, before he spiraled into the abyss of straight to DVD, reality television (lasting one whole episode of Celebrity Bull Riding Challenge) and appearing as Barney Rubble in The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas.

At some point during all this an anvil was dropped on his head and he became a raving Jesus freak, starting a teen ministry and writing a book called The Unusual Suspect (oh you see what he did thar?), about his experiences as a born-again Christian. Considering he refers to his brand of religion as “the new hardcore faith movement,” it’s not surprising that Baldwin is in your face aggressive about his love for Christ, sort of a combination between a preacher and a college frat dude. In fact, he’s become the archetypical obnoxious born-again Christian, using every occasion when a microphone or tape recorder is shoved in his face to proselytize (though being that it’s Stephen Baldwin those occasions are probably growing fewer and farther between), being blissfully ignorant of what the Bible actually says (an interview with Radar revealed he could name neither all Ten Commandments or all twelve apostles), calling everybody “brother,” renouncing any films from earlier in his career that might have had gay themes to them (though apparently the ones where he kills a bunch of guys are A-OK) and making outrageously dunderheaded public statements, such as suggesting that Bono would be better off preaching the gospel rather than working to relieve Third World debt. 

Stephen Baldwin is also apparently the sole John McCain supporter in Hollywood, which is the only barely reasonable explanation why he appeared as a guest on conservative talk show host Laura Ingraham’s program on FOX News last night, announcing that he will leave the country if Barack Obama is elected president.

It’s like they’re not even trying anymore

FOX News has officially given up their last tiny crumb of credibility and dignity. See the video here.

Can’t we just kiss and make up?

Dahlia Lithwick discusses the polarizing effect the Clinton-Obama race had on feminists, in which women who chose to align themselves with Obama have been accused of “betraying” their sisters, as well as the core feminist platform.

The worst of the intergenerational bickering of the past months has resulted from a failure of empathy; a breakdown in our capacity to acknowledge that the experiences of others are as compelling as our own. In a sense, we have simply been doing battle over whose stories are more legitimate—the second-wavers or their Pottery Barn daughters— or whose perceptions of gender discrimination are more accurate. Forgive me for saying that this is an argument that is singularly unworthy of us as women. Aren’t we supposed to be great and gifted listeners and connectors?

Before I go on, let me just say this: any Democrat who is serious about voting for McCain simply because they don’t want Obama as president deserves to have their voter registration card taken away, burned to ash and then launched into space. This ain’t the student council election, people, there is no room for juvenile “nanny nanny boo boo, I’ll show them” gestures here. This is especially true for female voters, considering McCain’s decidedly anti-feminist voting record: consistently pro-life, voting against funding for sex and contraception education for teenagers, voting against expansion and additional resources for state-funded health insurance for children, etc.¹ It’s time to get off the high horses and work together for a greater good, rather than letting pettyness and sour grapes guide our decision-making.

The rift between pro-Hillary and pro-Obama feminists is but one particularly public example of the in-fighting that plagues feminism. The ideal behind feminism is equality and support of women’s choices, yet no one is capable of making a woman feel more sheepish and insecure about her choices than another woman. The in-fighting between feminists is frequent, it’s harsh and it’s deeply hypocritical. It pits the childfree against mothers, the non-religious against Christians, women who choose to engage in alternative sexual practices and those who do not, even those who choose to wear makeup and high heels and those who do not. It elicits judgment and derision over personal decisions that impact no one else’s lives in the slightest. Amanda Marcotte of Pandagon a few years back wrote a blistering screed against the “embarrassing” decision to take one’s husband’s surname upon marriage, a decision that, let me reiterate, is nobody else’s goddamn business whatsoever, insisting that any woman who does such a thing is merely a weak-willed victim of societal pressure, giving into a bullying spouse who wants to claim ownership on her. But…but, isn’t feminism supposed to be about supporting women’s choices? Or is it merely the choices you support?

Recommendation: try switching to decaf

Not exactly new, but noteworthy: John McCain’s well-documented temper isn’t just reserved for political opponents and underlings.

In his 1992 Senate bid, McCain was joined on the campaign trail by his wife, Cindy, as well as campaign aide Doug Cole and consultant Wes Gullett. At one point, Cindy playfully twirled McCain’s hair and said, “You’re getting a little thin up there.” McCain’s face reddened, and he responded, “At least I don’t plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you cunt.” McCain’s excuse was that it had been a long day.

You make the call: an isolated incident caused by stress, or are we faced with the possibility of four glorious years of angry, assholish outbursts for which some flunky will need to make excuses? I imagine if McCain wins the Presidency he’ll have quite a few long days ahead of him, considering how much of a mess is going to be left over to clean up.

I am reminded of how Howard Dean blew his entire candidacy in 2004 by just one well-meaning but ill-advised outburst at a campaign rally. Imitating the Incredible Hulk is unacceptable in a potential presidential candidate, but calling the wife a cunt, in front of other people no less, is A-okay. Maybe I’m not supposed to understand.

From the No Shit, Sherlock department

The Washington Post brings this to our attention: Ex-Press Aide Writes That Bush Misled U.S. on Iraq. My first reaction to seeing this headline was, this is news? Really? Hey, I got a hot tip: the sky is fucking BLUE, did you know?

But then I read the article, and ah, the sky is actually blue. It’s not just any ex-Bush lackey, it’s Scott McClellan, and he’s writing a book about his former pals at the Frat White House. Are you shocked? No?

The book, coming from a man who was a tight-lipped defender of administration aides and policy, is certain to give fuel to critics of the administration, and McClellan has harsh words for many of his past colleagues. He accuses former White House adviser Karl Rove of misleading him about his role in the CIA case. He describes Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice as being deft at deflecting blame, and he calls Vice President Cheney “the magic man” who steered policy behind the scenes while leaving no fingerprints.

Still not convinced? Think that color isn’t actually blue, but maybe periwinkle or some other bullshit color Crayola invented to sell more crayons to crayon-addicted children?

But in a chapter titled “Selling the War,” he alleges that the administration repeatedly shaded the truth and that Bush “managed the crisis in a way that almost guaranteed that the use of force would become the only feasible option.”

“Over that summer of 2002,” he writes, “top Bush aides had outlined a strategy for carefully orchestrating the coming campaign to aggressively sell the war. . . . In the permanent campaign era, it was all about manipulating sources of public opinion to the president’s advantage.”

I’ve been looking up for the past eight years and saying to myself, “Yeah, I think that sky is pretty much blue.” But I might have vision problems! I might need glasses! Is there an optometrist in the house? I have this problem where I read phrases like “orchestrating the coming campaign to aggressively sell the war” and “manipulating sources of public opinion” and my brain interprets them as “lies” and “more lies”. Also, I have this oozing stye…

Remember our military dead and get 20% off a La-Z-Boy recliner!

While you’re enjoying wienies and potato salad at a Memorial Day barbecue, please take a moment to check out this interactive, AP-produced list of American soldiers killed in Iraq. It’s a comprehensive list beginning with Marine Major Jay Aubin, the first serviceman killed in March 2003, and ending with Army Specialist David McCormick, killed at the end of March of this year.

Take a moment to consider the extraordinary cost of human life wasted here. I mean, seriously, Bush gave up playing golf over it, it has to be a kind of a big deal.

Mission accomplished!

Republican presidential nominee Mr. Potter John McCain optimistically predicts that we’ll be done totally fucking things up in Iraq by 2013.

The Iraq War has been won. Iraq is a functioning democracy, although still suffering from the lingering effects of decades of tyranny and centuries of sectarian tension. Violence still occurs, but it is spasmodic and much reduced…it’s not a timetable, it’s victory. It’s victory, which I have always predicted.

Let’s do a little numbers comparison. Remember, kids, there will be a test on this.

• Revolutionary War: 8 years
• War of 1812: 3 years
• Civil War: 4 years
• Spanish American War: under 1 year
• World War I: 2 years
• World War II: 4 years
• Korean War: 3 years (less than a third as long as M*A*S*H lasted!)
• Vietnam Conflict: 12 years

Come on, guys, we can drag this out another additional two years, and then we’ll be tied for the biggest, most shameless waste of money and human life in American military history! TOGETHER, WE CAN MAKE THIS HAPPEN, VOTE MCCAIN IN ‘08.

YOU CAN DOOOOOO EEEEET!